What Does It Mean to Say Gender Is a Social Construct? Understanding Identity and Freedom

When people hear “gender is a social construct,” they sometimes mistake it for “gender isn’t real.” But that’s not quite right. Gender is real in the same way that money, traffic laws, and language are real—it’s something we, as a society, have agreed upon. But just like those things, gender isn’t fixed. It shifts across cultures, evolves over time, and is shaped by the people who live within it.

Take colors, for example. Once upon a time, pink was a “boy’s color” because it was seen as bold and powerful, while blue was for girls because it was delicate and dainty. That flipped in the mid-20th century due to marketing. That’s right—an entire aspect of gendered expectations changed because of department store ads. If that doesn’t scream “social construct,” I don’t know what does.

The Freedom in Understanding Gender as a Construct

When we recognize that gender is a construct, we get to question it. And in that questioning, we find freedom.

For me, that freedom came in the form of embracing who I actually am, not who I was told I should be. It meant stepping outside the expectations that didn’t fit and crafting an identity that did. And I’m not alone in that—every nonbinary, trans, or gender-expansive person you’ve ever met has, in some way, engaged with this idea. They’ve looked at the rules society handed them and said, “Actually, no. I’m going to do this my way.”

And isn’t that kind of beautiful?

Why This Matters for Everyone

Even if you feel perfectly comfortable within the gender you were assigned at birth, understanding gender as a construct still benefits you. It means that the pressures you feel—whether it’s to be a certain kind of man, a certain kind of woman, or to “perform” your gender correctly—aren’t natural laws. They’re expectations. And expectations can be rewritten.

When we let go of rigid gender norms, we make space for more joy, more self-expression, and more authenticity. We allow people to exist as they truly are. And in the end, isn’t that what we all deserve?

So, if gender is a story, let’s write better ones—ones that celebrate individuality, embrace complexity, and leave room for everyone to be exactly who they are.